My dinner with Belle's two Japanese uncles

boz says:
You made me so frustrated last night with all that msn messenger 7.0 stuff that I put my undershirt on backwards.
Belle says:
hahahaha, at least it wasn't mother boz's underpants you were putting on backwards
boz says:
I wasn't going to mention that
Belle says:
did you get some chain email from marci about NPR
boz says:
no, I didn't, national public radio?
Belle says:
unless there is another NPR i dont' know about
boz says:
non-puerto rican
Belle says:
i sensed something was wrong when the first sentence read liket his:
boz says:
you sensed???
Belle says:
Public Radio and Public TV are both very important to me in bringing daily

news and programming worth hearing and watching.

Belle says:
you know, like my spidey sense tingled?
boz says:
nerd
boz says:
which poinsettia is prettier this one
boz says:
http://boz48730.buzznet.com/user/?id=711511
boz says:
or this one
boz says:
http://boz48730.buzznet.com/user/?id=711562
boz says:
fine!!!
Belle says:
boz
Belle says:
they're both ugly
Belle says:
no offense
boz says:
hey, they are not
boz says:
they're festive
Belle says:
where do you find pink and yellow poinsettias
Belle says:
they're poison anyway, i can't have one
boz says:
you mean you wouldn't be able to stop yourself from chewing on the leaves?
boz says:
and they are red and yellow
boz says:
not pink
boz says:
pink would be wrong, just wrong
Belle says:
right, i have zero self control
Belle says:
and they are totally pink and lime green actually
boz says:
fine, be the jim carrey that stole xmas
Belle says:
lemony snickett?
boz says:
what is up with that anyway?
Belle says:
i like how you spelled unhappy camper hahaha
Belle says:
unahppy
boz says:
I know, I saw that
boz says:
I could have changed it, but thought ehhhh, let the peons think I'm human
Belle says:
lemony snickett is the new harry potter
boz says:
jim carrey is the new eddie murphy
boz says:
career down the plug hole
Belle says:
why are you bringing lavar burton into this
boz says:
point of order, is it levar or lavar?
Belle says:
who knows really
boz says:
point of order ... I'm taking minutes, so I need to know
Belle says:
i hate minutes
boz says:
why?
Belle says:
i hate chain emails
boz says:
I blame marci for that
Belle says:
i blame marci for lemony snicketts
boz says:
just don't forward the chain to me
Belle says:
i totally already did
boz says:
no you didn't, you aren't devious enough to think of that on your own
boz says:
bitch!
Belle says:
hahahahaha
Belle says:
i actually sent it to both your accounts too
Belle says:
i am sooo devious
boz says:
it's lost it's shock value, so you might as well stop
Belle says:
you stop
boz says:
I did
boz says:
we should be sending it to marci
Belle says:
yes!!!!!
Belle says:
let's spam the hell out of her
boz says:
ok
boz says:
go!!!
boz says:
that's 3 so far
boz says:
6
boz says:
is ten enough?
Belle says:
yes
boz says:
how many did you send?
Belle says:
i lost count
boz says:
I bet you didn't send any
Belle says:
i wrote something in each one though
Belle says:
no, i did, and i changed the subject to fool her
boz says:
you'll teach her to send you a chain letter
Belle says:
ok i'm done
boz says:
me too
Belle says:
i wrote some funny stuff, i hope she reads them
boz says:
I didn't I just spammed her
boz says:
you know funny stuff?
Belle says:
not really, i used that quotes from that post you did about your true love debbie
boz says:
what quotes?
Belle says:
i don't know
boz says:
you know marci's friend melrockcity?
boz says:
she im'd me a couple weeks ago and she wanted to chat
Belle says:
no way
Belle says:
she was drunk?
boz says:
she did, I think she was drunk, and she was pissed that no one was in the hot tub
Belle says:
wow, was she talking about that guy too
boz says:
like we live in there or something
boz says:
I don't remember what she was talking about
Belle says:
must have been memorable
boz says:
I think we talked about her father, it was very oedipal in a sad sick sort of way
Belle says:
nice
Belle says:
people always get uncomfortable when i tell them i was taken off the bottle too soon and that i have an oral fixation
boz says:
is it getting hot in here?
boz says:
hahaha
Belle says:
is that not an appropriate thing to say?
Belle says:
is that how you spell appropriate?
boz says:
speaking about oedipus complexes, how is you dad doing, any word on the by pass?
Belle says:
they are giving it 3 weeks and then deciding
boz says:
how old a gentleman is he?
Belle says:
put him on some meds to see if that will unclog his artery, but to me it seems unlikely
Belle says:
umm
Belle says:
60?
Belle says:
maybe?
boz says:
you asking me?
Belle says:
i think he's around there
Belle says:
not older
boz says:
do you wish he was older?
Belle says:
hahahahaha
Belle says:
i wish he hadn't taken me off the bottle so soon
boz says:
he took you off the bottle?
Belle says:
well, he broke it
boz says:
I bet he wanted to share it with you, now that is sick
Belle says:
don't talk smack about my daddy!
boz says:
he doesn't make you go out and buy diapers for him, does he?
Belle says:
no
Belle says:
but he does like baby food, and so do i
boz says:
and if he does, do you have any pictures?
Belle says:
hahaha
Belle says:
you WOULD want pictures, you were the one that "stumbled across" those pictures of the man dressing in his mothers clothes
boz says:
are these guys friends of your father?
boz sends:



Transfer of "51.jpg" is complete.

Belle says:
omg boz
boz says:
they're your uncles Kei and Wei aren
boz says:
aren't they
Belle says:
one of them looks like this guy i know in NY
boz says:
mr blue or mr red?
boz says:
I'll be posting that pic on rw...bs
Belle says:
i'll be refraining from commenting
Belle says:
i'm taking the boz quiz thing about the toothbrush es and whatnot though
boz says:
even after I refer to them as your pretend uncles
Belle says:
you wouldn't
boz says:
Belle's father likes her to refer to his two friends as her uncles
boz says:
I should take that quiz and see how I score
Belle says:
those are not my uncles
Belle says:
pretend or otherwise
boz says:
oh, so your dad just wants you to call them your uncles then

Belle says:
i got three that matched
boz says:
just three?
Belle says:
well
Belle says:
yes
Belle says:
and why isn't purple a choice for the toothbrushes
boz says:
you aren't even a wannabe
Belle says:
i know
Belle says:
i'm a "what's a boz"
boz says:
blue is close to purple
Belle says:
still then only 3
boz says:
and I bet there has been many a time when you have thought to yourself "what's a boz?"
Belle says:
ohhhh man
Belle says:
i would have contributed to the story
boz says:
you still can, it isn't over
boz says:
I'll make the pic a caption this pic post
Belle says:
great, my uncles won't be involved
boz says:
belle's two uncles arrive early to take her to the prom
Belle says:
noooooooooo
boz says:
two cousins?
Belle says:
the comments never work for me
boz says:
just write something and email it to me and I will post it
boz says:
make sure you mention your two uncles though
boz says:
they can be two of the three wise men
Belle says:
i'm reading what people have written
Belle says:
no uncles!!!
boz says:
amyjo has written most of it, I just advance the storyline
boz says:
which is actually the hardest part
Belle says:
hahahahaha
Belle says:
i just got to the part about you reaching out to jonnie
boz says:
I posted the pic
Belle says:
dont' you want to know which 3 i matched you on
Belle says:
and boz!!!
boz says:
let me see if I can guess which ones
Belle says:
those are not my uncles!
boz says:
what???
boz says:
I know, I said they weren't
boz says:
ok, you matched number 8
Belle says:
yes
boz says:
number 10
Belle says:
no
boz says:
number 9
Belle says:
no
boz says:
I'm good at this
boz says:
number two
Belle says:
no
boz says:
number 5
Belle says:
yes
boz says:
number 6
Belle says:
no
boz says:
number 7
Belle says:
no
Belle says:
hahaahahaha
boz says:
I know, number 2
Belle says:
no
boz says:
3
Belle says:
yes
Belle says:
geesh
boz says:
see, I told you I could get them
boz says:
is howie long gay?
Belle says:
the correct question would be
Belle says:
is howie long married to terri thatcher
boz says:
thatcher?
Belle says:
whatever
boz says:
it's hatcher
Belle says:
lois
boz says:
and today is her birthday
Belle says:
i only know her as lois
boz says:
and that is why I asked, because dean cain is gay and an ex football player, so I just assumed that howie long must be gay too
Belle says:
a boy once told me that howie long is married
Belle says:
so i think not
boz says:
my theory is that all ex football players that work with teri hatcher are gay
Belle says:
does she make them gay?
Belle says:
teri hatcher could probably make me gay
boz says:
I don't know, it may just be in her contract
Belle says:
i didn't know dean cain was an ex football player
boz says:
I only work with gay ex football players
Belle says:
isn't he dead now
Belle says:
do you turn them straight?
boz says:
yeah, he played college football at yale or harvard or wossamotta u
Belle says:
obviously you followed his career closely
boz says:
somebody has to
Belle says:
i can picture you at all his games, with the big finger waving
Belle says:
wearing his school jacket
Belle says:
and nothing else
Belle says:
hahahahahahahaha
boz says:
Yeah, I was warming the big finger up for after the game
Belle says:
until they asked you to leave
Belle says:
well that explains how you know he's gay
boz says:
the gerbil told me
Belle says:
you are mildly obsessed with this gerbil in the ass thing
Belle says:
it's like you were taken off the gerbil too quickly
boz says:
your point?
Belle says:
i dont' think you should run around saying it to just everyone, they might think you're weird
boz says:
at least I haven't gone thru life calling two japanese men my uncles
Belle says:
not that there's anything wrong with that
boz says:
do they bring you gifts?
Belle says:
goats
boz says:
pachenko machines?
boz says:
anime
Belle says:
anime porn
boz says:
sailor moon costumes that they beg you to model for them?
boz says:
don't forget the knee socks!
Belle says:
how do you even know who sailor moon is
Belle says:
if you are not a japanese uncle yourself!!!
boz says:
dean told me
Belle says:
when he asked you to wear the outfit?
boz says:
no, when he asked me to take it off
Belle says:
was teri hatcher in the room?
boz says:
her and howie both
boz says:
let's see, how does this sound. My dinner with belle's two japanese uncles.
Belle says:
sometimes i confuse teri hatcher and teri polo
boz says:
polo is rosa's last name
Belle says:
is teri her first name?
Belle says:
i thought it was posa?
boz says:
ahhh, you fell for the ruse too
Belle says:
well truthfully, i never gave it much thought
Belle says:
but if you put a gun to my head
Belle says:
and said tell me rosa's last name
boz says:
can I????
Belle says:
i would say posa
boz says:
please!!!!!
Belle says:
sure, but only if you video it
boz says:
and send a copy to jonnie
Belle says:
hahahahaha
Belle says:
that was the funniest thing ever
Belle says:
poor jonnie
boz says:
i was going to say something rude about just how poor jonnie is, but I thought better of it
boz says:
do you think anyone reads these when I post them?
Belle says:
i just had this horrible sighting, i scrolled quickly up the zonkboard and saw something about rosa's dirty underpants
Belle says:
i will not do that again!
boz says:
it's funny, I can tell you about it if you want
Belle says:
no, it scares me
Belle says:
i prefer to remain in the dark about rosa, you ruined it for me with the polo thing
Belle says:
i am really hungry though
Belle says:
like the wolf
Belle says:
and that has nothing to do with her underpants
Belle says:
and i hope no one does read these
Belle says:
i am a role model
boz sends:


Belle says:
no
Belle says:
i will not accept
boz says:
you'd better, for your own good

Transfer of "51ab.JPG" is complete.

Belle says:
boz!!!
boz says:
what, it's not like I posted it or anything
boz says:
yet
Belle says:
even if say, i was going to the hypothetical prom with my pretend japanese uncles, they wouldn't be wearing wrestling outfits
boz says:
I don't think those are wrestling outfits
Belle says:
rollerskates, maybe, but no wrestling outfits
Belle says:
well you would know what kind they are, as a card carrying NAMBLA member
boz says:
precisely, they are man/boy love outfits
Belle says:
where is yours
boz says:
one is at the cleaners and I'm wearing the other one
Belle says:
are you wearing a helmet
boz says:
I'm wearing the flowered one
boz says:
it isn't a l
boz says:
it isn't a helmet, it's a penis hat
Belle says:
ohhhh
Belle says:
how would i know, they're not my uncles
boz says:
sure
boz says:
so you're just a beard niece for them
Belle says:
NO
Belle says:
i do not know those japanese guys
boz says:
of course they aren't, they just wandered into your house by accident
Belle says:
that's not my house
boz says:
with their penis hats
Belle says:
and their magnets
boz says:
what color is your dads penis hat?
Belle says:
nooooooooo
boz says:
my jaws are hurting from all the frivlolity
Belle says:
you have multiple jaws?
boz says:
yeah, one on each side
Belle says:
i think that is still just one jaw
boz says:
ok, then, a lower jaw and an upper jaw
Belle says:
well that isn't each side
Belle says:
that's up and down
boz says:
if you are laying down it is
Belle says:
no it's not
Belle says:
unless you are laying down upside down
boz says:
you mean like I'm doing now?
Belle says:
like a bat
boz says:
out of hell>
boz says:
ladies and gentleman let's hear it for Meatloaf!!!
Belle says:
teri hatcher should work with meatloaf
Belle says:
he has to be an ex football player
boz says:
I bet he played in his backyard when he was a kid
Belle says:
meatloaf reminds me a lot of eric stolz
boz says:
he reminds me more of kevin bacon, cause they both sing
Belle says:
no, eric stolz in his finest role
boz says:
wasn't eric stolz in Fight Club?
Belle says:
like that was based loosely on meatloaf's life
boz says:
that would be one degree of eric stolz if he was
Belle says:
no way would eric stolz appear in a brad pitt film
boz says:
oh yeah, I forgot about the whole jennifer anniston thing
boz says:
wait? brad pitt was in fight club?
boz says:
I thought it was edward norton and eric stolz
Belle says:
hahahhaa
Belle says:
that i would definitely pay to see
boz says:
and meatloaf aday
Belle says:
meatloaf aday-hatcher
boz says:
I think you mean helena bonham carter
Belle says:
same thing, different color
boz says:
or ... same color, different thing
boz says:
so did you enjoy my dream about me being a prostitute the last time we talked?
Belle says:
oh tell me
boz says:
I told you, last time, don't you remember?
Belle says:
you only catered to men, didn't you
Belle says:
no i don't
boz says:
then how did you know I only catered to men?
Belle says:
what other kind of dream would someone like you have?
boz says:
point well taken
boz says:
actually I looked a lot like mac caulkin did in that one movie
Belle says:
the good son?
Belle says:
home alone 25?
boz says:
no, the one where he played the king of the club kids
boz says:
or queen of the club kids
Belle says:
oh the gay skateboarding movie
Belle says:
ok go on
boz says:
no
boz says:
the one where he killed fez
boz says:
you really want to hear this? it isn't a pretty story
boz says:
except for me, I was very pretty
Belle says:
i'm sure you were
Belle says:
go on, you're paying by the hour here
boz says:
ok, it started out with a friend and I wandering into a brothel
boz says:
and I thought gee, I wish I had some money so I could have one of these beautiful women
boz says:
this happened as we were walking down the hall and looking into all the different rooms
boz says:
then some guy came up to me and said "how would you like it if I fixed it so you could have all the sex you wanted and it wouldn't cost you a thing"
boz says:
and I said "WOULD I"
boz says:
and he asked me if I would like to work there.
boz says:
well, yeah, but I wouldn't think there would be much call for a male prostitute
boz says:
and he said ohhhhh, you'd be a special kind of male prostitute
Belle says:
hahahaha
boz says:
I said what the hell.
boz says:
then he said, ok, but we are going to have to give you a make over first
boz says:
and then two guys who looked like the makeover guys from the rikki lake show came in
boz says:
and they worked there magic on me
boz says:
when they finished, I looked in the mirror for the first time and ...
boz says:
I had spikey blonde hair
boz says:
multiple facial piercings
Belle says:
hahahaha
boz says:
make-up, but I think they over did the make-up a little bit
boz says:
I would never make my cheeks that red
boz says:
and I don't think I'd need false eyelashes either
boz says:
anyway ...
boz says:
I was wearing a pleather halter top
boz says:
a red satin mini skirt
boz says:
fishnet stockings
boz says:
and wedgies
boz says:
so when my make-over was complete the guy came back in and told me he had a special customer for my first time
boz says:
it was your dad and your two japanese uncles
boz says:
hahahahaaaaaaaaaaa
Belle says:
you're a real riot and a half
boz says:
nah, I made that part up
boz says:
my first customer was a boy who had justed turned 18 and I was to be his first time
boz says:
you have to remember that in this dream I was only about 21 or 22
boz says:
and I told the guy, no problem, send him in and I'll take care of him big time
Belle says:
big time, eh?
boz says:
and I did, without even touching him, just by talking to him
boz says:
and then I woke up
boz says:
weird huh,
boz says:
please say it;s weird
boz says:
or is that a normal dream for you?
Belle says:
uhh
Belle says:
i think it's normal to you
Belle says:
but weird to me
boz says:
except for the wediges
Belle says:
in my hooker dream i catered to men
Belle says:
i think this means something
boz says:
japanese men?
boz says:
in penis hats
Belle says:
no, anthony edwards look alike pharmacists
Belle says:
but back to you and your emotional problems
boz says:
rite aid or medicine shoppe?
Belle says:
i am concerned
boz says:
why?
Belle says:
i think this has something to do with your gerbil being taken away too early
boz says:
I was weened off gerbil milk at too young an age?
Belle says:
yes
Belle says:
i am going to get a peppermint mocha
boz says:
that happened a lot during the 50's
boz says:
fine!
boz says:
do that
Belle says:
you don't pay me enough for this gerbil/male prostitution business
boz says:
is that code for "my japanese uncles just arrived"
Belle says:
no, they've been here all along
Belle says:
i mean NO
Belle says:
i have to go
Belle says:
ciao
boz says:
fine, yeah, go,
boz says:
ciao